There
is a new movie coming out, “How Does She Do It?” about a working
mom who is balancing work, marriage and mommyhood. I really don't
know any more than that (I am the least of all a movie aficionado).
However, the title caught my attention. Not because I am also a
working mom, but because I hear the question, “How Do you Do it?”
at least once a week. Maybe I hear this question in such frequency
because I am a single mom, or because I work at a church, which means
unexpected busy seasons and trying, emotional workloads. If I'm in a
new place (new town/church/school) this question seems to come at a
rapid fire pace. It always feels a little awkward because sometimes
the question is asked with a little horror in the person's voice
“That sounds awful,
how do you do it?” (that's an exact quote) sometimes the voice is
filled with, (what I feel is undue) awe, “I can't imagine, how do
you do it?”.
No
matter how the question comes, I always answer the same... “We take
it day by day.” I feel like the question is undue and awkward
because I think that is probably how ALL of us are getting through
our lives, right? Day by day. We all have life circumstances that
make the balancing act a bit precarious or baggage that feels heavier
some days than others.
There
are certainly times when I feel the pinch of being a single mom.
However, I generally feel like I have a similar expectation set upon
me as any other parent (single or double!), maybe sometimes I just
have to get a little more creative to solve problems or get through a
day (see below). I also have a lot of help, like a lot! So much, in
fact, that I often think “single mom” doesn't represent our life
adequately. Its more like I'm the communication hub of the village
that is raising this beautiful princess. So, the “you” in the
question “How do you do it” should not be singular, its
definitely a plural meaning for us.
I
cannot answer, “How do you do it?” because I'm just “doing”
today...not yesterday and certainly not tomorrow! So, here is the
answer to how we (me, a head cold and Disney) got through a busy week, ending with today...
(keep
in mind this week was a week to be present with people, which meant very little writing time during the week. Plus, the princess had no school on Friday, so I was counting on my weekend evenings to do A LOT of work and then...) Princess
wakes up multiple times in the night with a fever, congestion and bad
cough: Pastor alarms start ringing when
is this sermon getting written?
Next morning the Princess
wakes up late feeling miserable, lies comatose in front of
“Alladin”...sermon written!
Princess
takes long, steam shower and then proceeds to fuss in her room for at
least 30 minutes over the outfit she has to wear...dishes done and
laundry folded!
Pastor
drags sick little one to church to get about ten different jobs done,
Princess becomes the perfect little assistant and we're outta there
in record time!
Make
lunch together.
Princess
takes medicine and lie comatose in front of “Robin Hood”...Bible
study prepped!
Board
games, walk, Barbies and book reading all afternoon.
Post-dinner
movie (“Toy Story”) and medicine, then bed...all other church
business is attended to!
It
still was a day of productivity and fun, just different that
originally planned. That basically sums up the “how do
you/we/ya'll do it?” Day by day, and a little creativity!
“Likewise
the Spirit helps us in our weakness...We know that all things work
together for good for those who love God, who are called according to
his purpose.” Romans 8:26, 28
